Weigh-in

Current weight: 74.5kg
Goal weight: 10st
Weight lost this week:-2kg (ie i've put on weight)
Total weight loss: 3.5kg

I'm blaming my grandmother because we visited her for the weekend and she always does enough food for 10 armies, and it's all unhealthy. It has absolutely nothing to do with my lack of self control, or the take away we had knowing we'd be visiting my grandparents the next day.
And we've brought 10 tonnes of food back home with us too (because they can't eat it all ) so the diet will have to restart tomorrow.

Having said all that, I am definitely thinner than I was.  My grandmother is very generous (not just with the food - haha) and bought some dresses for me and my sister in the sales last year.  Unfortunately, that does mean that if they don't fit then we cannot take them back for a new size, or anything.  Usually, if something does need to be returned, it's because I need a bigger size.  So my grandmother bought me 3 dresses, all size 16 (UK size).  I have only brought one of them home with me, becausee the others are too big!  It really is a shame, though, because one of the dresses is absolutely gorgeous, but will fall down if I'm not holding it (my needlework skills are definitely lacking!).  The second dress was not only too big around, but much too tall and long too (I'm 5'4").  My sister is trying to lose weight too, so I hope she'll soon be able to fit into those dresses so they don't go to waste.

I think it is fair to say that I am a sure size 14 now.  So, even though I've put on weight this week, I don't feel bad about it.  The worst that will happen is that I'd be able to fit into that lovely dress again. :-D

Library Visit

Today, another trip to the library.  DD1 decided that she should take out 5 books, and that I should take out 2 books, and she worked out that we'd be borrowing 7 books in total:

• Winnie the Pooh and the Heffalump by AA Milne
• Topsy and Tim: Busy Builders by Jean and Gareth Adamson
• Haunted Henry (Thomas and Friends), Egmont
• Go, go, go, by Llewellyn and Beard
• The Old Tin Bath by De Marco and Remphry
• The Magic Word, by Moore and Remphry
• The Nutcracker by Helbrough and Luraschi

Dear Diary,

I am tired.  I am not getting enough sleep, which I know, but don't seem to be able to do anything about.  DD2 is teething atm, so I am constantly being woken up in the night to be used as a comforter.  It would be better if she were that little bit older, so could manoeuvre herself into the right position, without waking me up.  Or if I slept a bit deeper, so I didn't wake up to her slight mumbling and grumbling (DH can sleep through it, so why can't I?).  Obviously, the best alternative would be for her to not be teething in the first place, but that's not a real option.

During the day, DD2 seems to be able to sleep well.  Yes she still mumbles, but also has long periods where she sleeps.  The difficulty with catching up on sleep during the day is that DD1 is awake, so I'm still on the go.  And even if, by some miracle, they were both to be asleep or self-occupied at the same time, I'd feel obliged to get on with all the stuff round the house that I try my best to avoid: washing up, clothes washing, tidying, and other general housework.

Watched a program last night called something like "How much do you do?" about how housework and chores are split between various couples.  Atm I'm ashamed to admit that I imagine DH does more than me, even though he's at work all day and I'm at home.  It is difficult, because when I'm at home I want to enjoy my children, spend time in and out of the house, and not be chained to the kitchen sink.  But that leaves me tired in the evenings (not least when I'm not having much sleep anyway) so I'd prefer to relax and veg out, rather than start the washing up or cleaning.  DH is a star.  He'll come in, sort out something for dinner (last night we had take away, so not so good for the diet), and will often wash up when I take DD1 to bed.  Because I'm BFing, DD2 doesn't go to bed yet, but hopefully it won't be too much longer before she's going through the night and will be sharing a room with DD1.  Just got to get this period of teething out the way first.

Thanks for listening,
LBP

Library Visit

We visit the library most Mondays, and always come away with new books to read for that week or so.  I want to keep a record of what books I have been reading with DD1 and DD2 (not including all the books we own at home).  So, it may not be on a Monday (like today), I will try to make a list of the books we have borrowed.

• Charlie's Ice Cream Machine, by Atkins and Leftheri
• Aladdin and the Lamp, by Robinson and Catling
• Moon Zoom, by Sims and Semple

Also, this week DD2 got her very first certificate!  
When a child visits the library for the first time, they are invited to join Book Start's Book Crawl.  Every visit to the library, they will collect a sticker.  Every 4 stickers, they will get a certificate, up to a maximum of 10 certificates.  On a Monday, at my local library, they do a Rhyme Time - which is why we always visit the library on a Monday.  Both DDs collect stickers for attending Rhyme Time, after which DD1 likes to choose books for the following week.  DD1 is collecting stickers for her final certificate, and DD2 has just collected her first.

Book Review: Teach Your Own by John Holt and Pat Farenga

Teach Your Own: The John Holt Book of Home Schooling.

John Holt is widely regarded in the field of Home Education.  As a newcomer/interested-other, I had been recommened to read a John Holt book.  Why Children Fail is often considered a good book to start with, but I decided to start with Teach Your Own.

It is an American book, written by an American Author, for an American audience, but it is still a good read for someone in the UK.  Yes there are chapters on the legal side of things in the States, plus much of the appendices are only really relevant over there, but they can be easily omitted.  Or, if you're like me, you'll read them anyway - just in case.

I found the first half of the book an easier read than the second half.  Maybe it's because I'm not anti-school, and so found the chapters focussing on the children to be much more interesting.  (Maybe I should have read Why Children Fail after all?)  Especially interesting were the discussions about how children learn to read and write (the confusion of b, d, p, q) and learning which is left and which side is right (these were in the chapter entitled Learning Difficulties).

Overall, I would say that if you want to homeschool your children, then this is a good book to read.  If you are still deciding whether to homeschool, then get somebody who has read the book, to pick and choose the appropriate chapters; especially if you are UK based; knowing some of the difficulties faced in the States, could deter you, unnecessarily, from home educating here in Britain.

Quote about schools

"One reason that so few schools are any good at their work is that they are not serious. "Good" schools and "bad," private and public, with only a few exceptions they have always run under the rule that when learning happens, the school takes the credit, and when it doesn't, the students get the blame."

Teach Your Own, by John Holt

Weigh-in

I started this diet 3 weeks ago.  I'm following (loosely) Fat-Burner Foods by Dr Caroline Shreeve because it works.  Basically there are two meal plans: Fat Burning and Stabilising.  On the Rapid Fat Loss weeks, if you follow it strictly, you will lose weight quickly, but it is hard to follow.  On the Stabilising weeks, you are not trying to lose weight, but to keep your weight stable and learn healthy eating habits.

I've never been a thin person (or argueably, a normal sized person) and when I went to university a combination of eating out, drinking and falling in love meant I put on a stone a year for the 4 years I was there.  I tried a few times to lose weight myself, or do extra exercise, and nothing worked.  I went on Depo Provera (contraceptive jab) and it is known that whilst this won't make you gain weight, it will inhibit weightloss - and I couldn't lose weight.  I was on Depo for 5 years before DD1 came along, with no problems at all.  After she was born, I went back on Depo, but this time it didn't agree with me, so I came off it.  June 2009 I decided I was going to lose some weight and decided I would follow the Fat Burning diet (mainly because DH got the book free with a copy of Men's Health!).  I was strict, at first, and the weight really does fall off.  Over time, I followed it more and more loosely, but the weight was still coming off.  In less than 6 months I had lost 2.5stone!  Then on Christmas Eve, I found out I was pregnant so I stopped the diet immediately.  (I had Hyperemesis Gravidarum when pregnant with DD1, so as long as I could eat with this pregnancy, I would make the most of it!)  DD2 was born in August, and I hadn't put on any 'baby-weight'.  I am breastfeeding, and I wanted to enjoy my Christmas, which is why I'm restarting my diet now.  I've still got a bit to lose before I reach my target weight.  And, my deadline for this weightloss is my sister's wedding in July.

So my stats, for this week (I've been on the diet for 3 weeks so far):

Current weight: 72.5kg
Goal weight: 10st
Weight lost this week:0.5kg
Total weight loss: 5.5kg

I will [try to] weigh myself every Monday and update how I'm going.

Dear Diary,

I love DH and cannot keep secrets from him.  Believe me, I've tried.  The only ones I do manage to keep are birthday and Christmas presents, but that's because I know there's a fixed end-date where the secret will be revealed.  Everything else, I just blab.  Which isn't necessarily a bad thing, as I don't think there should be secrets between husband and wife.  Secrets cause trouble.

So I mentioned to DH that I've started a blog.  He isn't keen.  In fact, he has asked me to delete it and keep a diary instead.  Thing is, I have tried to keep a diary (in the past) but it just doesn't have the same effect.  So, the blog is here to stay.  At least it is all anonymous atm.  I did ask him to read the first posts from yesterday, and he hasn't so that's his loss.

There's lots that have to get out, as it were.  I had a horrible pregnancy and birth with DD1, and a horrible postnatal period too.  Luckily she is gorgeous, and I'm am very thankful for the beautiful girl that I get to call my own.  Having learnt A LOT from that experience, I was determined that things would be different with DD2 and planned a home birth, although that, too, didn't exactly go according to plan.

I do try to educate others, to learn from my mistakes/experiences of my births.  Part of me is tempted to become a doula, but I'll have to think long and hard about that.  Another part of me wants to become a Breast Feeding Counsellor, to help other women be successful.  In short, I love learning and want others to love it too.  That's probably why I enjoy tutoring, and why I want to HE my DDs.  So whilst there's lots I want to do, I've no idea when I'll find the time.

I'm also trying to be the perfect wife, the perfect mum, a good housewife, grow my own vegetables, cook from scratch, and lose weight in time for my sister's wedding this summer - I'm a bridesmaid for the first time!  So when I should be juggling all that, instead I'm talking to you, which means I should go now.

Yours,
LBP.

Quote about Dummy Use

" How has our modern culture become so backward that we imagine mother to be a substitute for a plastic object than to recognize that the plastic object is a substitute for a mother comforting her child at the breast."

Signature of Laura T (150), a member of Netmums.

Is anyone a laid back parent?

Being a parent, we all do (or try to do) the best for our children.  Whatever parenting philosophy (or none) we adhere to, whether we work or not, whatever we choose, decide upon or fall into, we do because we love them.  I would love to say that "yes, I am a laid back parent" but we all know that no such thing exists.  What is true, though, is that I am much more laid back now I'm taking a more child-led, child-centric approach to parenting, rather than doing things because I felt I ought to do them.  It is also true to say that I am more laid back than some of my mummy friends, and in turn, I have more confidence in what I am doing, because I'm not stressed all the time.

I was tempted to call this blog A Lazy Parent's blog, however, thanks in part to the tabloid press, that would give the immediate impression that I don't give a damn about my children.  I hope that it will become evident that that is not the case.  I do, though, thing there is something good to be said for taking the easy road, or making life that little bit easier for yourself.  Does it really matter that your house is slightly untidy, or your children are wearing the same clothes as yesterday?  Why stress about your baby not sleeping in their cot, when you can have uninterupted sleep earlier if they share your bed?  Why make up purees when you can give your child the same food as you make for the rest of the family?  Does it really matter if your child is 2 years and a day, or 2 years and a month, or 2 years and six months, or 3 years, etc. and still not potty trained?  Why do you strictly adhere to routines when all it achieves is stressing out your children, you family, and you?  Just relax and try not to worry too much.  These things all work themselves out in the end.
Now, if only I could follow my own advice...

Abbreviations

Not an exhaustive list, and probably includes many that I won't ever use, but here goes:

AF: Aunty Flo – Period.
AP: Attacthment Parenting
BF: Breastfeeding/ Breastfeed/ Boyfriend/ Best Friend
BD: Baby Dancing - Having sex
BFN: BIG FAT NEGATIVE
BFP: BIG FAT POSITIVE
BH: Braxton Hicks Contractions
BIL: Brother-In-Law
BLW: Baby Led Weaning
BTW: By the way
CS: Caesarean Section
DD: Dear Daughter
DF: Dear Fiancé
DH: Dear Husband
DP: Dear Partner
DS: Dear Son
DSD: Dear Step-Daughter
DSS: Dear Step-Son
DTD: Do The Deed or Did The Deed
DW: Dear Wife
EDD: Estimated date of delivery
EmCS: Emergency CS
ElCS: Elective CS
FF: Formula Feeding
FIL: Father-In-Law
FWIW: For what it's worth
G&A: Gas and air/ Entenox
HB: Home Birth
HCG: Human chorionic gonadotropin
HE: Home Education
HG: Hyper emesis Gravidarum
HS: Home Schooling
HTH: Hope that helps
IYKWIM: If You Know what I mean?
IKWYM: I Know what you mean
IIRC: If I Recall Correctly
IRL: In real life – ie the real world (step away from the computer!)
KWIM: Know what I mean?
KWYM: Know what you mean
LBP: Laid Back Parent (i.e. Me)
LMAO: Laughing My A*** Off
LMP: Last Menstrual Period (Start Date)
LO: Little One
LOL: Laugh out loud
MAP: Morning After Pill
MB: Messageboard
M/S: Morning sickness
MC, m/c: Miscarriage
MMC: Missed Miscarriage
MIL: Mother-In-Law
MW: Midwife
OB/GYN: Obstetrician/Gynaecologist
OMG: Oh My God
OH: Other Half
PG: Pregnant
PMPL: “Weeing” my pants laughing!!
ROTFL: Rolling on the floor laughing
SAHD: Stay at home dad
SAHM: Stay at home mum
SAHW: Stay at home wife
SIL: Sister-In-Law
S/O or SO: Significant Other
SPD: Symphysis Pubis Dysfunction
TBH: To be Honest
TMI: Too much information
TTC: Trying To Conceive
TTFN: Ta Ta for now
VBAC: Vaginal Birth After CS
WAHD: Work at home dad
WAHM: Work at home mum
WB: Waterbirth
WUM: Wind up Merchant

Introduction

I'm a happily married mum to 2 daughters: DD1 (born in 2007) and DD2 (born in 2010).

The older I've got the more 'hippy' some of my ideas have become:
I'm now a SAHM, who tutors part-time;
I tried for a home birth with DD2;
BF DD1 for 10.5months, still BFing DD2 and would like to make it to a year;
I've used both disposeable and reuseable nappies;
I'm an unintentional co-sleeper;
I'm trying (and failing) to grow my own vegetables;
I did/do Baby Led Weaning;
I'm a Christian who doesn't think you have to go to church;
and I want to home educate, to name a few of my 'funny ideas'.
Above all, I try to relax, be laid back, and enjoy my children and DH.

Why am I starting a blog?  Obviously I have some egocentric need for my voice to be out there.  I don't have much to say, but what I do say I am passionate about.  I also find writing (blogs/on forums) to be therapeutic, so yes, this is all about Me.  Yet, at the same time, I want to have some degree of anonymity, which is why I'm using the abbreviations and acronyms more commonly found on parenting forums.  I hope this doesn't put anyone off what I have to say.  Maybe one day I'll come out, as it were, but for now I'm happy being LBP (Laid Back Parent).

As yet, I also haven't decided about use of photographs.  Whilst my logical brain knows that there are soooo many pictures of children on the web, that it's incredibly unlikely for it to be a problem, the other part of my brain wants to protect me and my family, especially my daughters.  So, to that end, for now there won't be any photos of us, and a more boring blog this will be.